ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
You said eat breakfast. So i poured Baileys on top of m&m's. It taste just like like cereal I swear.
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
"I vaguely remember the Health and Safety Inspector walking into my room this morning while I was passed out naked. That's one way to get it over with quickly."
I thought I was pretty much sober now but then I realized I've been eating scrambled eggs with my hands...
i want to live in a society where a 20 year old can wear pigtails and not get them called handlebars, because i look fucking adorable in them.
I just used a beer funnel to put gas in my car
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
I took my makeup off with mouthwash. Seemed like a good idea. It worked.
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
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