Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
dude i just figured out that the tostitos sign is two people eating chips and salsa. being high totally pays off sometimes
Okay, guy from work I want to fuck just told me he liked the font on my PowerPoint presentation. It is so on.
Make me proud, climb that corporate ladder.
There's nothing worse than waking up naked on the beach covered in sand and a family walking by.
you can hold your grudge or you can accept the alcoholic treats as a peace offering. your choice
peace be with you.
Priorities: waking up on your doorstep desperately clutching half a meatball marinara but with no sign of your keys, purse or housemate. Where are you?!
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
I just wish my penis was a person so I could give him a high five.
He wants another date...I mean he's cute, but I just am not ready to give up my glamorous single-girl lifestyle here.
you mean the one where you drink out of the carton and don't wear pants?
Yeah, and pee with the door open. It's the little things.
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
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