Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
we sang an acapella version of barbara ann to his voicemail...i'm not drinking again until tuesday.
fyi, we didn't break up, we just downgraded to occasional sex without ever talking about it.
you said grace in the diner. 5am, drunk, grace. you thanked the man w the mushroom cut for the wonderful supply of screwdrivers
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
I just can't have sex with a guy who has nicer eyebrows than me
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
Dude, I passed out on the side walk, lost my phone and shirt, and walked 12 miles home after I disappeared from the club
Believe me honey Imma fuck the discount out of at least one plastic surgeon in my life
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
All you need for a happy life is Jameson and slippers
Guess who's now on the no-fly list? If you guessed me, you'd be right.
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
Jack and I got in a huge fight at 6am. He fell asleep when I was giving him head so I freaked. We were both black out so I made a memo in my phone reminding me
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