you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
Leave it to him to get us kicked out of a bar for hitting on an 80 year old woman. I want to be that wasted one day.
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
A gay guy went down on me in the club bathroom and then fixed my makeup for me
its gonna be a great night
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
Your first mistake was thinking that you could get through the day without drinking a single bottle of alcohol. Your second mistake was wearing shark boxers.
You know shit got weird when you watched another guy shove drugs up your wife's ass and it wasn't awkward for any of us....
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
I kind of just assumed by how he whisked eggs that he would be bad in bed.
I've never been so turned off by an omelet.
Not my lover. I would rather lose all my teeth, and I fucking love my teeth.
Pretty sure the delivery guy saw me taking a shit this morning
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
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