I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
You ran away and I found you three blocks later lying by a dumpster because "that's where your life belongs"
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
even your uterus rejects him.
apparently my uterus is the smartest part of my body.
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
i told her she would have to blow me everytime we lost a game of beer pong, she never noticed i purposely hit our opponents in the face every other shot
She tied her key to her bra the night before and couldn't get it off while trying to open the door this morning so she just took her bra off and let it tangle from the key while unlocking the door...the old Indian couple next door were shocked.
stop sending me battleship coordinates and get back here so i can suck your dick
Beans, may the odds of a nip slip and drunken make out session be ever in your favor
I'm having a funeral for my vibrator. Please be there. I need your dick for support.
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
You just sent me an audio message of you peeing. That’s true love right there.
I don't mean to alarm you but are the strongest testicles in the family. I just learned I can lift 90 lb with my balls! Beat that.
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