Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
I've realized that you're the only friend i can rely on to drink with me any given day. i thank you for that.
so just saw tiger woods pull a page out of his wifes book and hit some kid in the head with a golf club
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
I'm sorry I can't get drinks with you. I have to make sure my dad doesn't go to jail.
i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording
Dude. I'm super jealous I'm not there. Plus I look really pretty tonight, I'm wearing my long blue dress, I have long blonde hair, and I'm just sitting here hitting Larry the Long Bong. I'll pretend like your 3 spirits are floating in my smoke. Fuck.
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
Like I'm sorry but "it'll be fine trust me" IS NOT VERY REASSURING ASSHAT. Now take off your pants.
I'm drunk from drinking bourbon out of a "cupcake sippy cup" at the Denny's bar. What the fuck happened to the goals I had?
How about this: I support you through your miserable marriage, and you support me through all my anonymous sex?
Well this guy just went into a detailed lecture about how rinos are developing into unicorns.. It's gonna be a good night.
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
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