In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
I miss you like a fat girl misses the prom.
you thought your tounge was "malfunctioning" because every time u spoke it wouldnt sit still.
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
I want to spend time with you, and by time, I mean real time. Not your dick in my mouth time.
TIL a potato cannon can be loaded with dildos as ammunition. Boy, do our neighbours love us!
Do you think if 10 year old us knew that we would be passing out in a McDonalds after a hefty night of drinking, and 23 McChickens, they'd change anything?
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
Wikipedia just saved you three hours and $30 on a bar tab. You should donate.
$5. Donated.
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
This reminds me of the time you were crying and puking in the toilet at that party while i did shots of tequila in between blow drying your feet. miss you!
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
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