And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
she was so wasted that she tried to tuck me in and read the jokes on the taco bell sauce as a bed time story
You're so easy to please, it's adorable. Like an alcoholic puppy.
I've been here 20 minutes and some creepy old man told me he wanted to know what my insides felt like. I hate gay bars.
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
trying to imitate man vs food after 12 shots doesnt mean youll get laid
there's another hole in my ceiling...someone fell through the attic this time....
I woke up with cheeseburger in my mouth and a deep sense of accomplishment.
It's the eternal vodka... it never seems to go away
in my drunkeness I still was able to plan for the morning. I duck taped my keys, a water bottle full of mimosa and my cell phone to the front door.
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
Stop letting me drink while doing my makeup. I think I used sharpie for eyeliner.
Randomize
