i wonder how he feels talking to my mother about jesus with a condom on his dick
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
on a brighter note, the strip club found my atm card
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
I woke up five hours later with a mouthful of Jimmy John's while clinging to my sandwich.
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
So apparently blacked out me judges a man based on what type of dinosaur he would be...
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
His exact words: "I don't have anything you can't treat with antibiotics."
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
Xanax, wine, and giving the neighbor blue balls. How about you?
Jesus, it’s Tuesday morning! Not back stage with Motley Crew
Randomize
