hey soul. what's that? you, dignity and pride are left for the night? coulda told me that before i vomited all over my mother.
as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
So I ripped my crotchless fishnet body suit when my drunk ass tried to crawl through the crotch to put it on.
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
He got punched in the face last night? By who? I’ll invite him to our formal. Seriously.
Randomize
