All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
capris are just wrong
its like "what can i possible wear to make myself look short and fat? Oh I know!!"
I wish i could make my toaster dance like they do in the second ghostbusters. But i dont have ectoplasmic goo. Or a toaster.
I just puked in the walgreens aisle buying gatorade and advil for my hangover... i guess i failed
standing in line at subway, they've got 'stand up and get crunk' blaring. the lines out the door and everyone is dancing. Lombardi Gras rules.
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
When she was dating that guy she told me If they broke up, I would receive a call and no matter what I was doing I'd have to go over a fuck her. It's like being an EMT for sex.
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
no, but he did start crying. who the fuck is 30, covered in tattoos and crys about an ex? get your shit together, man.
You said you liked how I put the cream cheese on.
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
Fell asleep on kitchen floor again, chicken nuggets everywhere.
The stripper was dressed as the green lantern. Even for a geeky girls' bachelorette party it was lame ass.
I continue to impress myself. Also I'm probably pregnant
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