There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
Just got hit on by a middle-aged puerto-rican clown who told me that it would be bad to date someone who offers to buy me coffee and makes something of themselves. I love the NY subway.
YOU'RE HIGH AND AT THE GYM OF COURSE YOU FEEL WEIRD
My thighs feel like glass
He snapchatted me his dick and he's circumcised....BRB going to hug his Mom
He was wearing running shoes tho. Thats like the cardinal rule. You don't fuck a guy who wears running shoes as regular shoes.
Bringing my cat to a booty call was not my finest hour
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
What am I doing? I'm usually only attracted to horrible people.
Would it be inappropriate to meet you at the airport after your family vacation so I can tell you all about the amazing sex I have been having?
Please tell me why I’m standing naked in the kitchen drinking pickle juice out of the jar & there is a container of potatoe salad with no lid & a spoon in it on the floor 🤦♀️
I look like a hot mess, emphasis on the hot now, more emphasis on the mess later
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