Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
I baptized my dog in my pool last night because he snapped at my party guests, how was your night?
Is it 3pm? Or am I losing my mind because it's pickled in vodka and diet coke?
I felt like in order for him to make it to mordor and destroy the ring, he'd have to make sweet sweet love to me in some form of hut or cave.
how do you expect me to pass the time when I'm too old to be jailbait but too young to legally drink
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
Today is a shit your pants at work kinda day
Never thought I'd say this, but getting head from a skeleton was better than I thought. Happy Halloween
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
It's the first weekend of the school year and I'm already selling stuff for booze. Need a microwave?
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
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