hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
he was CRYING into my vagina
can you pick me up an extra syllabus
i passed out in the shower again
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather
Dude, you were so wasted she couldn't wait. She was grinding your face while you were passed out in the yard.
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
just saw a kid get pissed on buy a tiger at the zoo. His dad is rofling and the kid is crying. I think I have to go make a new friend
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
He just texted me asking for his shirt back and I said I didn't have it and then I ran into him 5 minutes later while wearing the said shirt
She rode me wearing nothing but a Santa hat. Merriest fucking Christmas!
The high school classes are online, not my sex life. He still comes over for “teacher / parent conferences.” A couple more “conferences” and I’ll be able to rewrite the Sex Ed curriculum
Randomize