Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
Ugh now I'll have to carry around an overnight bag to all the bars I visit tonight. but hey! maybe I'll meet a dude! And need it!
ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
You know what, matt, a girl is not really that interested in a relationship if she goes down on you the first time she meets you
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
hahahahaha your sister just walked down from the guest house with a stain on the front of her shirt and "owned" written in blue sharpie on her forehead. i dont think she knows what happened last night either.
I think this breakup is Gods way of telling me I deserve a bigger dick
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
Mass text to all of my back up boy toys. First one here wins. Mama needs some.
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
So yes we had an orgy last night and I sucked your tits while you fucked my husband but I am weird about sharing my toothbrush.
you were on all fours in the front yard puking, but managed to hand the pizza delivery guy a beer and to have a nice day.
Pro tip: When you spend the afternoon banging your boss, don’t meet your mother-in-law for dinner if you still smell like cum and watermelon flavored lube
Randomize
