Hahaha figures, hmm should I spank you? Or throw a cow at you?
So the last day on the vacation I woke up in the bath tub. My mom said she asked me during the night what I was doing and I said, "swimming."
he whipped it out and it smelt like my toilet after taco Tuesday
Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
Please tell me how you drunkenly remembered your social security number when we were checking you into the ER.
Well you really should've thought of that before you painted your walls the same color as your toilet
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
I need to beat up a magician now. BRB.
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
He woke up in a dragon costume, covered in bong water. That was a party we will regret missing.
I'm beginning to think that women just have dogs at home as an excuse to leave ASAP after hooking up, without sounding like a typical guy.
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
Randomize
