He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
i want you to feel like i'm letting you into my heart, not just my vagina.
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
my new ipod has external speakers and a video camera...all i can think about is how much more convenient it would be for me to make a pretty decent sex tape
I'm hoping you can explain why I woke up with what I believe is pumpkin pie all over my body
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
then my gynecologist said "its like opening up buried treasure"
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
Lets be real here, you loved it when I was on top. With and without the machete.
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
Yeah. Got a major ego boost when she said she felt like she had just fucked King Arthur. Buying some donuts later to celebrate with, wanna join?
He offered to take me to my appointment after breakfast then kind of just sat there and watched me get a papsmier. Most awkward first date ever.
Im legit just salty with everyone who has a penis right now
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
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