Hot mess moment: I just made really spicy guac and picked my nose, which set it on fire. I tried to neti pot it with a coffee pot, which resulted in me gagging and puking all over my bf's bathroom. oopsie.
A baby just go on our party bus. What. The. Fuck.
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
Her eyebrows were plucked so thin that she had to have gonorrhea. Clean girls just don't pluck that way
Because you work where i will be drunk tonight I'm asking you. Is a shirt required on Halloween?
ok. i'm ready for you to come back and test the structural integrity of this futon.
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
He is really drunk but I just found $20 so it's like I am getting paid to babysit
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
.......he just venmo charged me for the burrito I was eating while he broke up with me
His name was Dragon. For real. How do you not sleep with a Dragon? Don't judge me.
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
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