Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
Based off the amount of cat hair on my poncho....i stole a cat last night.
And I really REALLY don't feel like cleaning cinnamon off my penis tonight.
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
Fuck. I have to get my shit together by lunch. Mission impossible.
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
The owner was showing me around and pointed at one of the bars and said "this is the one you're allowed to dance on. I could tell you wanted to ask." DREAM JOB.
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
Howd last night go?
well he stumbled in my parents door drunk and then asked my mom if she was my grandma. Id say as far as first impressions go, he failed miserably
Randomize
