my vag is singing 'hurts so good' by john mellencamp
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
Always fun waking up to 911 as your last dialed call.
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
I don't think anybody else enjoys making out with multiple guys on the same night as much as I do. I'm like a wine taster but with lips... it's like art to me. The bruise on my upper lip is proof of it
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
If there's so much of a hint of a whisper from somebody I didn't tell personally, I will cut off your balls with a chainsaw, cauterize the wound with a flaming rusty spoon, feed your balls to your dog, and feed them to you when he shits them out, capiche?
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
I'm wearing the monkey suit out tonight. I hope you're ok with it leaving the bedroom
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
Some guy at the bar last night bought us Arrowhead water and I was so drunk, it tasted good
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
Randomize