Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
The only thing in that hotel room that we didn't fuck on was the roof
by the end of the night two people were passed out at the table, three on the couches, and one in the bathroom. it looked like someone pumped sleeping gas into the middle of a dinner party.
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
I'm at the perfect height to walk up to the corner of my mom's stove and rest my balls on it. Just thought you'd like to know they're warm.
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE.
I am making dinner in lingerie and heels and there is a 75% chance his roommate is going to walk in on this.
Yup. There he is. This conversation is awkward.
I totally forgot about finals week. im the worst adderall salesman ever.
I'm jealous that you can use my boobs as pillows & I can't.
At least you didn't get an invite in the mail to your fuck buddy's baby shower like I just did. My life is a sitcom
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
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