Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
Today's forecast: A sex tornado warning has been issued in your area. Counties affected include your bed, your shower, or your couch. This warning is in effect until further notice. Signs of a sex tornado include: your girlfriend coming up with a huge analogy to inform you that she's ungodly horny today.
Why is there ANOTHER stolen fire extinguisher in my room? You know that's a felony right...
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
After sex he just told me I'm definitely pregnant and it's a girl. Should I run?
Just bought condoms with a walmart gift card. Thanks grandma.
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
It's so Britney 2007, you know?
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