Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
I just asked the contractor building my house what it would cost to put a garbage disposal in all the shower drains...there was a lot of judging going on.
I walked into the garage and you were telling the bikes that you were not that drunk.
SURVIVED FINALS. CAN'T DIE FROM ALCOHOL POISONING. NOTHER SHOT. CAPS.
I had to feed him the pizza because he was too blazed to do it himself
I am at Brians in a pirate costume, what the hell am I thinking
I folded my dollar bills into mustaches in preparation for our trip to the strip club
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
I woke up naked with a duck on my head. I think something went horribly wrong.
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
Randomize
