Gettin pulled over, can you watch my dog and pay the bils for a while?
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
Every perfect package comes with a warning label.
Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size.
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
he was like "can i get a kiss" and i was like "can i get a taco"
They had to take me to the ER because I got a concussion in a parking garage. Not partying with lesbians for a while
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
I was giving this fat lawyer a table dance and he asked me if I would be willing to play with his long, hard stick of the law. And you want me to stop drinking at work?
I don't even remember what dignity looks like anymore. I JUST WANTED TO ROAST SOME POTATOES
Randomize
