Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
If I were a boy, I'd name my penis Reptar.
Michael Bay diarrhea
I fell asleep with crest white strips on and ate one...
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
It was smashing those cupcakes into my face that did it. Junk food and I don't mix.
His fuck buddy just got fake tits and wants him to 'come break them in.' I need his life.
I showed that dick picture that your date texted you to everyone because you passed out and left your phone unattended. Your fault. Plus his cock was big so his fault too.
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
While running home from the bar in high heels I multi- tasked and sexted with Brent. Jesus.
He was so hammered. He called the cops on the landscapers he thought they were trespassing. 2 were arrested on warrants.
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
He said 'I really struggle with the sin of lust' then we proceeded to have sex. So I guess it was a perfectly executed Catholic pick up line?
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
I'm drinking because I just started here and every single person I work with wants to quit and when I asked a coworker how she's doing she literally just started crying.
Randomize
