Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
I remember spending $50 at Ozzie's on Friday...my Visa remembers $120.
im gonna put my furry chinchilla vagina on her mother effing nose
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
Can you help me get ready before work? I need a look that says I'm-happy-to-help-but-I'm-hungover-so-leave-your-attitude-at-the-door-because-I'm-not-taking-anyone's-shit-today.
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
I'm pretty sure I broke my breathalyzer by breathing vaporized vodka into it.
What did you do with the dog when you went into the club?
coat checked
After 25 beers and 3 shots my best friend thought it would be an amazing idea to get his dick pierced. We are on our way.
the person she was housesitting for had a christmas card from charlie sheen on the fridge so we fucked on the couch and just slept in the bed
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