Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
just found a shoebox labled "emergency smoking box"... it has a lightbulb, 2 potatoes, a dried up flower, and a button that says "stop drop and roll". what did we do last night?!
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
Honestly, I don't care if the only reason she gave me her beer was because she was bisexual and wanted to touch my vagina. Beer is beer.
there was a kid getting taken out of the waterpark handcuffed to a wheelchair singing "tryna catch me ridin dirty"
You talked about giving to sperm banks on a first date. What did you expect?
I never should have let my cousin and his pregnant girlfriend move in with me. I'm never having sex again. They scare off men more than 'my dream wedding' pin board.
Third base with a 7ft basketball player last night. Fingers like a champ. I call him Edward Penishands.
I ran into cvs barefoot with my belt undone and shirt buttoned wrong and didn't even have to ask. The guy working pointed and said "they're back there."
That's how I look going for the pbr.
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
Sorry I crashed a riding mower into your garage door. No hard feelings??
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