What a tease, dude. She's giving me emotional blue balls.
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
there is no 'pace myself' on the blackout express
just went back to the bar and asked if they found a shoe last night.
I blacked out at the bar, and blcked in getting a handjob on a roller coaster. Sober me is jealous of drunk me.
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
Only you would have a vasectomy while you're awake and report on the soundtrack first
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
The hardest part about being a child of divorce is when you're at your dad's house but your condoms are at your mom's house.
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
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