What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
I feel uncomfortable when she gargles my jizz.
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
All I know is she had me sitting on the kitchen floor with her little Pomeranian eating potato chips And shredded cheese. I don't even know dude. I don't even know.
Yeah I remember I tried to close her head in the freezer last night
I told him if I was pregnant we were coming out to the people at work, because I'm not pretending to get knocked up by an imaginary boyfriend.
I just looked at a girl and was like what disease does she have? And then my mind caught up ohhh shes pregnant.
Debating whether the Plan B I had this morning would go under breakfast or lunch in my food log.
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
Woke up in a house I don't know, with someone else's pants on, and wolverine hair, to my girlfriend yelling on the phone about the 4 girls I made out with last
I wanted to make my beer stronger so I poured vodka in it. Why god....why
I'll tell you all about it in person but let's just say the big dick fairy must really like me right now
I'm drinking because I just started here and every single person I work with wants to quit and when I asked a coworker how she's doing she literally just started crying.
Randomize