My dream in life is to scissor with Ellen. I don't care if I've got a dick. I'll make it work.
I think I'm going to start texting all the people that don't want to talk to me
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
Dear vodka that I hid in a water bottle in the backseat of Blairs car, I'm sorry that she gave you away to a man on side of the road with an over heated engine. I'm sure the car doesn't appreciate you as much as I would have.
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
my first words to him the next morning were "do you like magic"?
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
Today I'm playing this game called how physically long can I Lay in this one spot before moving, do you have an estimated time of departure?
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
My dad told me to bring weed to easter Sunday dinner..
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
College is really paying off. I am gonna be a great teacher. I just made a grading sheet for weed. This shit got an A.
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