i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
New requirements. My future husband must have a nose ring and wear headbands.
We are no longer friends.
Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
he said 'i love fucking you, ashley'. it was the most romantic thing he's said during sex because he actually used my name.
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
No clues in my phone. Only dialed call: my own social security number. And that was before 10:00pm.
Apparently I walked to Denny's in the pouring rain without shoes just socks last night. Excellent.
Fun fact. I am at the police dept. getting served a warrant for unpaid ordinance... and the officer was a one night stand from like 10 years ago.
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
I just took the soggiest of beer shits and all i have to eat is shredded cheese and more beer. I need an adult.
Is it bad that I'm tracking my period with Instagram pictures?
Nothing too major over here lately. Just had a date with an ex-internet porn star turned lawyer. He said: "at my 3rd burning man I taught a workshop on BDSM" and I knew it was going to be a fun night.
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
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