Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
I think we should involve a squid next time we fuck.
u kno there is a reason i dont tell mi friends about u
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
they were having a wine tasting so i tasted every wine...then knocked over an entire display of gourmet olives and was asked to leave... but they still let me buy my 6 bottles of wine before escorting me out
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
We talk about tequila and blow jobs the way that normal people talk about the news and the weather.
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
I'm in a pile of cheezits at an unfamiliar location watching dateline on tlc. Stage an intervention.
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
In my dream I had to eat so many peanut butter and Nutella sandwiches
I want you more than I want a burrito.
I'm not as filling.
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
Randomize
