doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
Having kids is risky. They might end up weird.
did you hook up at the wedding?
No but I jerked off on the hotel sheets. I wanted to get my moneys worth.
last night this guy was hitting on me by showing me the famous people he had in his contacts on his cell... when he asked me if i knew lindsay lohan, i said "whose that? sounds asian"
They were like stripper heels, except business stripper heels, the kind strippers would wear to court.
I think it was you who decided that coming home at 3AM and cooking eggs topless was the best way to end our night. Eating the scrambled eggs off each other's boobs, that was ellie's idea
You were throwing ham at people telling them you were the sandwhich fairy
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
Unlike bears, this weekend is not the #1 threat to America. It is, however, the #1 threat to my liver
but there's so much I wanna do before I have kids. like die
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
Randomize
