sometimes you just have to masturbate at your friend's house.
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
Guy in the room next to us in the ER is chanting "I'm jeff and I'm drunk". He's trying to get released to finish tailgating for the Iowa game that starts in 9 hours.
Honest to god.. She looks better fat. I never would have imagined those words coming out of my mouth, EVER.
Pretty sure that's a used tampon hanging from the tree outside my window.
Please come and rip my uterus out before it does it itself
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
How the fuck do you get a noise complaint filed against you at 9:30am on a fucking Tuesday?
Would it be inappropriate to meet you at the airport after your family vacation so I can tell you all about the amazing sex I have been having?
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