dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
she made me cover her fishbowl with my shirt because she "didn't want to corrupt it."
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
He picked me up went to throw me on his bed. I landed on the wood frame. That's how I broke my rib. We still fucked. Thanks tequila. Best injury ever
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
So, since you're now a four night stand, I feel comfortable asking: Did I leave my sunglasses at your house? Or my underwear?
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
I have just received a gold-medal-deserving sext. He wrote me a fucking novel. Not only am I incredibly turned on but I am beyond impressed. He is the sext god. I must bow to him.
I only live four blocks from the bar but when you're hammered this walk feels like the journey through Mordor.
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
Randomize
