Have you ever looked at the 750mL bottle of wine on the seat next to you knowing that it's just not going to be enough?
Each and every day.
All he was doing was sitting in the car, staring. We asked him what was wrong and he just turned, smiled, and said "everything has its own pair of boots"
Mass Text: Free blowjob to first person to bring me a nacho cheese chalupa.
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
She left a blanket, pillow, a glass of water, and two advils in the bathroom for me. It's like she knew. Best room mate ever.
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
I'm at a gyno in Japan. Safe to say every possible rule of etiquette is about to be broken. Buckle up, motherfuckers.
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
Why can't you just be normal and get dick pics from your exes like everyone else?
I just had a flashback to me puking and you telling me it was okay because my boobs still looked awesome.
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
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