He just stood there...Helen Keller and I could have had a more interesting conversation
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
I have vodka an food stamps. At some point today, that will undoubtedly turn into jello shots.
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
All i want to do is drink fuck and cry... you dont have to cater all three its more like the saddest choose your own adventure ever
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
Went outside and he was playing rock paper scissors with a cop over a drunk in public ticket.
well he somehow got his hand stuck in some bike spokes trying to reach for a blunt he dropped and that's NOT the reason he's in the hospital...?
We went to Olive Garden so high we didn't talk and managed to be awkward enough for the waiter to ask if it was our first date
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
i just found my fake in the snow. LIFE IS AWESOME
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
When the paramedic asked Logan how he fell he explained that he was trying to lick his eyeball, missed and tripped over his own tongue.
Randomize