I tried to give up sex for lent. It feels weird that on easter I'm this excited to be a whore again
it took everything i had not to yell out "your name means death in german!"
Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
hahaha! you have a girlfriend
tell that to the new girl at work who i screwed on the washing machine today...
Have you ever noticed how boring internet porn is after you cum? I can't shut my computer fast enough.
twelve hours since my last beer and i just blew a .08, time to go to the library
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
Also, last night I had a dream that I was in a victoria's secret fashion show and they made me wear a t-shirt over my lingerie. Spring dieting begins now.
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
Ugh contemplating vodka and chocolate protein powder as this Capri sun and vodka isn't really cutting it
He was so fat that he broke two of my ribs
Maybe it's time to stop screaming I'm a chubby chaser every time you enter a drinking establishment
I'm totally going to bang the cable guy tonight. I'm so pumped
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
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