Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
if i die, you can have my worn out liver and american apparel deep v's.sell the liver to a chinese restaurant
Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
Every time I type "should" my phone autocorrects to "shouldn't". even my phone knows my ideas are terrible.
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving.
they fed me a peach. i was laying on the floor telling them how beautiful they were
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
My mom was looking at curtains for me and sent pictures and I had to be like "not the Disney princess pink and purple, more like an acid trip"
you started petting my head and said "there there, majestical unicorn. it won't be long before we get you back to neverland."
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
Randomize
