omg omg i just fucked paul. i need to stop doing this kind of thing.
wait, who's paul?
exactly.
i always forget guys have bellybuttons
When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
I woke up with a solved rubics cube in my purse
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
You described pouring milk in your strawberry cereal as a glittering magnificent water fall, skimming over the mountain and little strawberry citizens.
That accounts for only three of the penises
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
You said you were uncomfortable with your body and then you started making whale noises
I know I'm high, but the dude in target definitely just told me that it's best to walk through every door in life like you're a t-rex....
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
Woke up and took my pants off only to realize that I was wearing my shirt from last night as my underwear
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
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