I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
We stayed in and smoked weed and watched Dreamgirls. We made each other's vaginal lips sing the songs. Mine was Beyonce, hers was Jamie Foxx. I think this is one of those times you're jealous you're not an awesome lesbian.
I just dropped off shoes at Mike's hotel. The chick he hooked up with last night stole his phone and shoes.
For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.
i promise the blood crusted on your tits is from him motorboating you after he tripped into the pool stick. nothing else.
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
Let's stay in this weekend and play drinking games to the Winter Olympics.
As long as we can drink anytime we see a stray dog, mafia looking Russian or double toilet.
"I'm pretty sure all our toasts were to Ben Afflecks penis last night."
He's like a hurricane
a drunk, sexist, hurricane
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
We have angered the beer gods. It feels like I'm shitting angry cats.
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
I just put poptarts in the toaster with the wrapper on, that's how hungover I am.
Randomize