is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
i was like hansel and gretel. i puked a trail from mcdonalds to our place so i could find my way back in the morning
I bought a nasal spray, my nose needs to be in order by the weekend
I've got 15 minutes to eat dinner and drink a 40. Four years of college has all been training for this moment.
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
My tights ended up on the driveway folded neatly. Any ideas how that happened?
I nicked my vulva while shaving and I'm about to go on a date where I will be having sex. Which bandaid: My Little Pony or princesses?
Taco Bell is giving high school kids free tacos STEAL YOUR BROTHER'S WALLET I'LL BRING THE WEED.
I'm glad you enjoyed the night but why were you calling me "daddy"?
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
He said he broke his back in 3 spots & my first thought was "there goes my booty call".
Did u have a 2nd thought
I need a new booty call.
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