I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
He told me he could read braille... with his tongue. So I took him home. I don't think he was lying
My farts smell like St. Pauli Girl. Last night was too much for a Monday.
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
You talked about giving to sperm banks on a first date. What did you expect?
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
Bunch of Navy warships just sailed into New York Harbor for Fleet Week. Nobodys getting laid this weekend.
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
I feel like parents watching our children. You want to step in and help them but you just have to let them make their mistakes
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
A person can only vomit Fireball so much before they quit it forever
Apparently today is power bottom appreciation day
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