woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
The prostitute across the street from us is having a seizure on her front lawn again.
it is entirely possible that the police will be knocking on the door in 25 minutes
Not only is it unacceptable to be bar hopping alone at 5 o'clock. It is definitely unacceptable to do so with a lobster
But Alex is drunk in Philly and I told him to come see me so that's "first-love,-drunk,-high,-and-it's-a-snow-day-hook-up-with-an-ex" points. 69
Didn't know what to wear so I ripped off my bed sheets and tied myself a toga. "a little hungover" is no way to describe me right now.
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
Wow. Memory lane. What a horrendously unsightly jizz stain on the tapestry of life.
I stole the butter cup cuz i brought home my rolls and chicken and didnt want the butter everywhere. I miss your body because its amazing.
oh dont worry mom i am not sick my cough is from a recent increase in recreational drug use
that will happen
Randomize
