I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
i feel like barbie the morning after an elton john party
Me liking this guy is the best diet ever. Do I want this cookie...or do I want to get laid.
Pretty sure I went to the bar in my bathing suit, sweat pants, and high heels.
Omg I just met another drunk guy that is teaching me karate
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
I don't even fuck like that, he just happened to be in the right place at the right drunk.
It's a low moment when you're looking at your girlfriends tits on your daughter's phone..
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
Why I hate online dating: not even one day in and a 57 year old asks me to call him "Daddy."
I refuse to fake an orgasm. If I'm dating him, he better work for that shit.
I’m never getting home or fucked or eating hot Taco Bell fml
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