Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
I wish they made sweatshirts for legs
you mean pants?
Throwing up while listening to pandora radio. Don't tell me my life doesn't have theme music.
Somehow I don't trust you in this state to talk to you about a colonoscopy
Divorce is final. Doing tequila shots at 1 in the afternoon.
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
Is adulthood just morning sex and then walking through the grocery store 20 min later looking for something to take to work for lunch?
...and then running into your dad at said grocery store...
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
Listen, dont tell me about your day or that your mom is in town. Don't ask me to drive you to the airport or proofread your paper. Text me when and only when you have a boner. Oh and take your pants off and leave your front door unlocked because I'm coming over.
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
I never thought I'd end up with a prison pen pal through tinder
Yeah, so if you ever try to steal it, just know my tongue's been on it in several occasions. All over it.
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