is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
giving yourself 2 days to recover i see
I'll need it. Largely because i'm going to be stumbling through fancy restaurants with a bottle of whiskey insulting couples all night.
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
You threw a bottle at the bartender and then stole his tip jar. However, you were quickly KO'd by the bartender. Solid right hook.
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
1.) You left the rest of your whiskey here 2.) I drank your whiskey 3.) then made a steam roller out of the bottle 4.) Everything tastes like whiskey
I mean nobody wants to admit they ate 9 cans of ravioli but i did and i am not ashamed of myself
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
I would pay to watch a Bravo special of you getting Botox.
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
You took motorboating me in public to a whole new level. You poured your beer down my top and LAPPED IT UP.
This is my college life. Rolling at 4PM on a Wednesday to skrillex in the parking lot of a mexican restaurant.
I'll truly miss your penis but your use of words and phrases such as bae, yolo, swag, and totes have ruined how attractive you once were.
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
Randomize
