he was walking around the bar drinking wild turkey and gobbling simultaneously
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
I'm watching Pretty Woman alone and weaving a basket for Fiona. This is my life.
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
Don't do shots out of Tostitos scoops.
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
I gave myself a charlie horse masturbating this morning. I feel like that really set the tone for the day.
That's why my boobs are so big, they're full of secrets.
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
you should come have a drink with me (non alcoholic or otherwise) im at the same bar as your sister and a few guys that would apparently "lick your butthole"-congratulations
Randomize
