yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
dude totally just got the jungle juice out of my white top. i am really ready to be a trophy wife.
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
Let's just do a victory lap through all of our exes.
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
Why is there soup literally in every orifice of my body?
Tried to put an eye patch on while hooking up with a girl. She was not amused.
Anyway, it's clearly a shapeshifting vagina/AT-AT, which I never said I was SEXUALLY attracted to. Just that I liked it.
Apparently she "missed me" and the only logical solution was to fuck my brother.
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
just woke up on the floor with a bottle in my hand. and by bottle, i mean a baby bottle. half filled with tequila.
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
Randomize