I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
im starting to measure my showers by the number of beers i drink while im in there.
i'm wearing my white shorts to coax my period out of hiding.
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
Mother fucker. I'm a 30J now. I'm fucking speechless
Upon further investigation it turns out it wasn't blood, but chocolate frosting from the cupcake I shoved in my pocket to "save for later"
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
I was doing handstands in the jail cell and crying “IM A HIGH SCHOOL TEACHER AND IT’S CHRISTMAS EEEEEVE”
I am downtown smoking a joint with Woody Harrelson...Because our car won't start. I will be there as soon as I can.
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
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