I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
She def said "you had your chance!" after telling me she had a boyfriend. Like a pile of dogshit lecturing me on how I missed out on having itself stuck to the bottom of my shoe.
the last 2 times weve had drunk sex ive had to get the morning after pill.. he's turning into a real expensive fuck buddy.
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
Went biking. Saw homeless guy beating in the park. Thought of you <3
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
Also when they left they could only find one sock between the two of them. Apparently we're like crazy sock ripping vixens when we bring guys home drunk
Nothing quite like pre-gaming the Kentucky Derby with adderall and adderall. I'm fairly confident I could outrun all of these fucking horses in a foot race right now.
The only time we had a decent conversation was when he was on acid, and, like, that's not a great start to a relationship.
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
Are you ok?!
I assume I've stopped bleeding because I haven't passed out, but can't verify currently.
This is why you have to watch more Zombie movies- to prepare for End Times...
FINE. BE CELIBATE AND ACCUMULATE CATS. SEE IF I CARE.
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
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