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• (917): View more from New York City

  I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.

  (201): View more from New Jersey

  so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay

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• (512): View more from Texas

  I just had to explain to the pharmacy cashier that the Plan B and thank you notes I was buying were not related.

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• (954): View more from Florida

  I decided it would be a good time to smoke on one of my deliveries but then I got the munchies and ate a piece of the pizza I was freaking out so I told him it was our new pacman pizza

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• (906): View more from Michigan

  I literally just saw a campus policeman riding a Segway pull over a moving car. you should just give up.

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• (917): View more from New York City

  They had some plan b on the table between the beer and the guacamole. Yeah, it's gonna be a fun party.

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• (208): View more from Idaho

  Just want you to know I am def drunk enough to burn down your house. Don't worry I checked the stove like 6 times. I love grilled cheese

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• (405): View more from Oklahoma

  Sometimes I wonder how you ever made friends then I remember it's because you blew your way to semi-relevance

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• (770): View more from Georgia

  Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals

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• (818): View more from California

  Now that I'm single, I like to think of myself as in a relationship with Taco Bell.

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• (631): View more from New York

  I had a girl last night tell me that she was happy to find a condom wrapper in my garbage because,and I quote, "well at least you're not raw dogging every slore that crosses your path"

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• (416): View more from Toronto

  i just got banned from the m&m's website for trying to get poon slayer written on my custom order

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• (915): View more from Texas

  Just kidding.  Don't worry, you're getting sugar and orgasms for Valentine's day.

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• (508): View more from Massachusetts

  I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.

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• (952): View more from Minnesota

  HE PEED ON ME. THE MANAGER OF THE BAR.

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• (206): View more from Washington

  Its safe now. But... Nobody should sleep on my bed tonight.

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