My brain says no but my pants say off.
i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
Just saw the new iPhone. I would totally let Steve Jobs and Jon Ive eiffel tower me right now.
FYI you just passed out mid-blow job. Consider this my letter of resignation.
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
A guy with no shirt on and a eyepatch just got out of the car beside me. After he slammed his door into mine. This is our hometown.
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
remember when I told you about my grandma asking me about my sex scars? Less comfortable than that
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
After fooling around at the hotel til dawn, I managed to feed her with my free buffet passes. Tastes like sweet victory.
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
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